Okay, I don’t want to speak for the blogger in question here, because I’m not her. All I’m doing is pointing out that your original post was condescending, and if you are a frequent reader of the blog then you should feel familiar enough with the blogger (as most of the STFUP community is) to at least give her the benefit of the doubt.
Again, I don’t see the point in taking me to task over being condescending toward a blogger who runs a blog where the entire point is being condescending. I guess it’s okay to be condescending toward people, just as long as it’s not someone you like?
Also, do we give the moms who write those goddawful posts on facebook walls the benefit of the doubt before we make fun of and laugh at them? Nope.
If you don’t think calling people “cookies” is condescending well… I’m not sure what to say. I suppose it’s subjective but I can’t imagine calling anybody I even marginally respected “cookies”.
Well, then, I strongly advise you don’t call anyone you even marginally respect “cookie.”
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t talk about gender equality, or that there’s an “appropriate” platform for those conversations. I’m saying, I really highly doubt B was ignoring that there’s a gender issue, and I’m willing to give her the benefit of the doubt, and I would think most STFUP community would. I think you’re picking a battle with someone who’s already on your side of the fight. She said explicitly that she’s basing her idea of husbands and wives sharing household responsibilities on her own experiences, and she hopes that’s the case everywhere. She’s not saying that the shared responsibility is true everywhere, but that it COULD be true, and she hopes it is (or will be).
If you are making fun of someone because you believe their perception of reality is wrong, and as it turns out, for most people, their perception of reality is totally fucking spot on and yours is actually a little off-base, you should be corrected. I don’t care how puppies and kittens her outlook is. The truth of the matter is, it’s a puppies and kittens outlook that does not reflect how other people live…and it’s really not cool to make fun of people because their life isn’t as puppies and kittens as yours is.
And I do think tone is important, especially on Tumblr where some people are so confrontational. If you have a problem with B, post a comment, write her a message, even reblog with why you think her post was problematic.
Look, I’m not going any further with this, because I think it is BEYOND RIDICULOUS that I’m being criticized for having a less-than-gentle-and-respectful-tone toward someone who has made a name for herself ripping on other people. I think what she does is hilarious and awesome, but that doesn’t change the fact that I think that you believing I should be nice to someone whose thing is making fun of people (which isn’t on any planet anything but snarky, condescending and mean) is re-donk-u-lous. I get that you like her and think she’s super cool. However, that’s not how things work. You don’t get to laugh when your friend is a condescending asshole to someone you don’t like or don’t respect, and then get all offended when someone is a condescending asshole toward a person you do like and respect when she was off-base. That’s called a double standard, sweet pea. Yes, that was meant to be condescending.
If B is really that understanding, I’m sure she gets that this is the internet, and sometimes people are snarky. That’s her entire MO, after all.